The Gnome and I – Adventures in First Time Home Ownership – Chapter 15

The Gnome and I – Adventures in First Time Home Ownership – Episode 15-
Bathroom Reno Part Deux

To read from the beginning click here: The Gnome and I

As you may have read in Episode 2 the bathroom was a disaster from day one.  I had wanted to remove the ugly vinyl on the floor and replace it with tile.  But, as is the case with inexperienced first-time home-owners, I had already overspent my renovations budget the first year.  So the floor had to wait until the following year.

One day I heard Henri muttering in the hallway as he peered into the bathroom.

“Je ne peux plus le supporter!”  (I can bear it no longer!)  I found him at his most Shakespearean, one arm up against his forehead, a pained expression on his face.  (Henri can be quite the drama llama at times!)

“Whatever is the matter?” I enquired.

“Une grande insulte à mes sensibilités!”  (A grand insult to my sensibilities!) he answered mournfully.  “Le plancher; il doit être changé!”  (The floor; it must be changed!)bathroom floor Henri“I agree completely.  Let’s get to work!”  And, of course, by ‘work’ I meant I would be doing it whilst he would be overseeing and making comments.

The first thing I did was to paint the lower half of the walls, which were covered with this ridiculous masonite made-to-resemble-tiles board.  Apparently a leftover from the 1950s.  I had wanted to replace it with proper wainscotting but the budget would not allow it.  Painting it was a good option and white made the bathroom look brighter and larger.  It needed two coats of paint. I used latex semi-gloss.

Henri referred me to an article in his Better Gnomes & Gardens magazine showing an inexpensive way to change a bathroom floor was to paint it.  My budget had not recovered from all the previous expenditures as of yet to afford tile, so I thought this would be the perfect way to go.

The hideous vinyl was already torn and peeling off the floor.  There appeared to be plywood underneath which would be easy to paint.  What could go wrong?  (Note to Self:  Stop asking this question!)
So I began by peeling the vinyl off the sub-floor.  And was horrified to find seven different types of flooring pieced together!  Who does that?!

bathroom floors
I also found some mould on the underside of the vinyl in some places.  How moronic to lay down vinyl or anything on top of patched sub-floor.  A disaster waiting to happen!


As I only have one bathroom I had to paint and repaint one  section at a time.  I painted four coats using satin finish floor and porch paint to cover all the various pieces of sub-floor.  So it took about a week with drying time.  A painted floor should be sealed.  I’m allergic to polyurethane and I haven’t found a natural sealant yet.  (I really should have had a piece of plywood cut to fit over the sub-floor but as I still plan to have a tile floor I thought painting would be quick fix.)



finished bathroom

Finally; a proper bathroom any mermaid would like!  I’m happy with the way it turned out.  And Henri’s sensibilities are no longer insulted! 🙂


  1. Looking good 🙂 And it’s good that Henri is happy, the last thing you want in you home is an upset gnome. Ooh, that rhymes…
    “The last thing you want in your home –
    A disgruntled and out of sorts gnome…”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Well done on your creative problem solving on a low budget. It looks much better. And it’s good to put your own stamp on a new place like that.
    The cheeky little boss monkey has his moments.
    When Henri uses the toilet, does he stand on a box? Or is there a miniature toilet just for him somewhere. Inquiring minds want to know!
    I think it’s time Gnomes and Gardens did a feature about Henri’s crib. He would take all the credit for your ideas if they did!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks, Doubtpuppet! Henri has appointed himself Royal Contractor.
      Henri has his own outhouse in the back garden. The Mermaid Queen does not share her throne 🙂
      As it happens, Henri has written to the editor and is awaiting a reply.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’m glad to hear you don’t have to share the toilet with him. You’d never hear the end of it. Plus I’ve a feeling hed generate a powerful odour despite his size. Oh goodo – I hope he gets featured!

        Liked by 1 person

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